I Spent The Holidays All Alone (LOVED It!)

I Was Blind to My Own Self-Abandonment—Until Now

I spent Christmas all alone. No friends. No family. Honestly, I’m sincerely thrilled about it.

Dear Permission to be Powerful Reader,

I’ve never, in my whole life, done 100% me for Christmas.

It’s very illuminating what kind of person I am at my core. Just this alone is worth trying sometimes. I think.

I always get sad around the holidays.

At this version of Mike Tyson, I realized I thought it was because I felt lonely around the holidays. It’s actually because every holiday season, I abandon myself.

I spend time with people who I don’t like. Who don’t value me? Who can’t see me?

Who don’t deserve me?

They reinforce the idea that I have no worth. I will do my private meditation marathon, which involves lots of running and writing.

I’m going full Chris McCandless.

I’m doing me 100%.

I’m going to shine more brightly than ever.

Just ONE year ago, I was still so heavily programmed to prioritize others over myself that I spent THOUSANDS to go and spend almost a month among a bunch of people I d…